South of the Border

We went down to Kalispell with our friends, the Salmons, for a couple of days this week. On our way down, we stopped at the Alberta museum in West Glacier. I got a kick out of the T-Rex holding the Canada flag...

While in Kalispell, we found an awesome restaurant called HuHot.

This place puts Mongolie Grill to shame. It is the same concept, but instead of charging you by the weight of your meal, you pay a flat rate and get to go back as many times as you want. For $12 ($8.50 at lunch), you take your bowl, fill it with whatever meat, noodles, and vegetables you want, add your own sauces, then watch the cooks grill it. Pretty cool, especially considering one bowl cost me about $20 at Mongolie Grill (and it was a small bowl too). I've seen $30 bowls too. I went back three times in one visit. If you don't live in a state that has a HuHot yet, it could be worth relocating...

I should stop going to pet stores, they rub on me the wrong way. Don't get me wrong, I love animals. The Petco had lots of cool geckos, lizards, snakes, etc. It's the people aspect that drives me nuts. People who treat their pets like children should be spayed or neutered themselves to prevent passing on their genes. Granted, there are people who are doing the world a favor by having pets instead of children, but I digress. There was a display of car magnets by the checkout, most of which I could respect. The usual "I love dogs" or "I love my cat"... but this one?!?

Grandogs?!? By Hades' armpits, who came up with this one?! Congratulations, you've taken pet parenting to a whole new depth of stupidity! So, either your child(ren) have dogs that you count as grandkids, or you have dogs who had puppies and you kept those as well because you could sooner give away your own child than one of the puppies. Either way, it's not looking good for you. The first option is probably the most depressing as you have already passed on the stupidity gene to the next generation...

These?

You've got to know I'll have issues with this... Edible greeting/birthday cards for your dog. You know Lassie can't read, right? Right? What am I saying... If you're dumb enough to have purchased a card for your dog, you probably read it to him. Oh look Mr. Muffins, it says "Just bePaws I love you". Isn't that sweet? Not only do dogs not read, they don't get the subtleties of the English language and a play on words. Also, do you give him birthday cards every year, or are you a diehard who follows the 7:1 dog year ratio and give wondermutt a card every 52 days?

I thought this was good too. This little gem is on the front doors at TJ Maxx. This could be a contributing factor to the decline in the American economy. I don't want to come across as overly negative here, but let's face it, this was not your brightest moment. I wanted to watch for a while to see how many confused customers stood at the door debating on whether they could in fact enter or not, but then I realized those who can read, don't. I'd be curious to know how many people (including staff) actually noticed this...

My New Nemesis

So it turns out my brain isn't bouncing back as quickly as I'd like. My concentration isn't anywhere near what it used to be. For example, the other day I went upstairs to get the flashlight so I could do some work in a poorly lit area of the basement. Got up to the kitchen and couldn't remember what I was looking for. Went back downstairs. Hmm, it's dark over here, I was going to get the flashlight. Back upstairs... crap, what was I looking for again? Back downstairs, oh yeah, the flashlight. Back upstairs (need the flashlight, need the flashlight...), flashlight is in the bedroom. Whew...

Let me introduce you to my new nemesis...

That's right... Simon, and all the variations on the theme. I just picked up the Disney/Pixar Cars game for the DS. One of the mini-games is watching the pattern of blinking lights and then repeating it. it starts with a few 3-light sequences, then 4 lights, and I'm toast at 5 lights. I had to get Trevor to do the level for me so the game would let me continue.

I know I used to be able to do these, because the Clone Wars DS game has a similar mini-game (but with blinking planets), and I was able to do an 8-item sequence. As a side note, how bad is it that my base-line comparison involves various DS mini-games? I do a little better on the real Simon because it uses the same pattern and builds on it (eg. A, AB, ABC, ABCD,...) where the DS games are random sequences (eg. A, CA, ADB, DCBA, etc...). On the 5-item sequence, I can't hold on to the first (or sometimes the second) item long enough to repeat it back.

I keep telling myself that the doc says I shouldn't be alarmed and I need to give myself time to recover fully. If I'm not getting better by about 8 weeks post-accident, then he says we'll talk about the next step. So, I guess I'll try playing the game again in early August to see if there has been any improvement...

Worst-case scenario, what's so bad about not being able to play Simon? Well, if I understand it correctly, it means my working (or short-term) memory isn't running on all thrusters. A normal person can handle seven items. Without improvement, this means I can't hold onto a phone number long enough to use it. And phone numbers typically require a high degree of accuracy. You can't miss one or two numbers and still get the person you intended to call.

This might just be me over-reacting because I have a couple years of university psychology, but it's still very frustrating...

Crappy Customer Service: Our New Social Norm??

A social norm is one of those unspoken rules which everyone expects everyone else to automatically know and observe. One of the easiest ways to tell what is a social norm is by observing people's reactions when you break one. There is no manual or rule book which tells you not to talk to the person in the restroom stall next to you, or that you shouldn't let your child(ren) run loose and unsupervised in a restaurant, but if you try it you'll notice a change in behavior which tells you there is a norm violation in progress. Try facing the back of a crowded elevator instead of the front, see how people react.

I would like to suggest that crappy customer service, at least in the Quick Service industry, is one of our new social norms. Think about it, when you go into a fast food restaurant, what are your expectations of the quality of service? It seems for the vast majority, as long as we get what we ordered in a reasonable amount of time and the staff aren't actively trying to drive us away, we're usually content with the transaction.

Allow me to demonstrate with an example. Last night, I went out to McDonald's (because it was right next to the hotel where I was staying). The owner was running the till and taking customer orders. I was very surprised to see him actually making conversation (or trying in some cases) with customers as they waited for their orders to be filled. What was even more surprising was how many people reacted as though this was a huge inconvenience. All the classic non-verbal cues were there to indicate this man was violating an established norm. They would back up a bit, increasing their personal "no-fly zone", give looks of annoyance, avert/avoid eye contact... When they did answer, it was with very short responses, many times with quasi-grunted "uh-huh" or "uh-uh".

Has the service level in the fast food industry been so poor for so long that we as customers just expect it to suck? As part of an informal survey, I recently walked around a mall food court to see how many of the staff were smiling. Out of around 12-15 outlets, only one staff member smiled. The body language of the customers was quite revealing as well. They didn't act disappointed or offended, but rather showed signs of accepting the behavior.

As consumers, I fear we are the frogs who were boiled alive without resisting. As long as the water temperature is turned up gradually and we are given time to adjust, we just sit there until it is too late. We don't really realize just how bad the service has become until we find those rare examples of great service. Have we just given up in expecting to be treated as a valued customer, or have we become aclimatized to the point we don't even realize how poorly we're being treated?

My New Ride

It's been about two and a half weeks since the accident and the insurance company was very quick to get us the payout on the car. I went in to Murray Chev in Lethbridge and talked to Bruce about a new vehicle after doing some research online. The service was outstanding, if you're in Southern Alberta and looking for a vehicle I'd highly recommend paying them a visit

Originally, we had been trying to decide between an Impala and an Equinox. After I got a chance to actually sit in one, I immediately decided in favor of the Equinox. It has all the safety features we were looking for and is very comfortable inside. I will never buy another vehicle without OnStar...

Here it is in our driveway. I thought I should get a picture of it while it was still clean... Yah, it's "only" a 4 cylinder engine, but there's only 80hp difference between this and the V6. Since I'm not going to be towing anything, that's not a big deal. It also gets about 10mpg better fuel economy than does the V6, which had more impact on the decision making process. When you drive between 1550 and 1860 miles each month, that adds up to about 10-12 gallons saved each month (37-45 liters), and with fuel closing in on $1/liter again, that adds up.

Here's a shot of the dash. The telescoping wheel is awesome and reduces a lot of arm strain (for me, anyway). Controls on the steering wheel for cruise and the stereo. There is a USB plug in the center arm rest console where I can plug in my iPod. I can then control the iPod from the steering wheel, which is very handy for all the time I spend on the road. I can skip forward or backward in the playlist without taking my hands off the wheel. It took me a while to figure out that the power door lock buttons were below the environmental control buttons in the center, but I found them eventually. The childlock button for the rear doors is also in the center, which I think is a great idea.

Another great feature is the Bluetooth connection (for phones or GPS). As soon as I start the engine, the car recognizes my phone so when a call comes in, the stereo turns off and the fan goes to low so I can take the call (by pressing the phone button on the steering wheel). The stereo display also shows me the incoming phone number, way cool.

The digital display panel in the center of the drive console can show all kinds of useful information, like a digital speedometer, two trip meters, compass info, even a drive timer.

Plenty of storage space in the back. the seats can slide forward up to 8", so even the passengers can have leg room (I even sat in the back to make sure). In fact, this is the first car I remember driving where I've been able to comfortably slide the seat forward. The seat goes up quite a ways too, as Dawn found out. This is without a doubt the most comfortable car I've driven. The visibility is also very good. One of my complaints about the Aura (may it rest in peace) was the rear-view mirror could (and did) hide a whole car at an intersection because it was so low on the windshield.

Anyhow, I'll be putting on around 1800km's in the next two weeks, so I'll have a good chance to break it in on the road. And sure enough, the day after I pick up my car, the new 2011 models come out. Oh well, doesn't look like they changed a lot...

Happy Father's Day Babe

It's that time of year again... all the commercials for power tools and barbeque gadgets, trying to convince consumers that somehow they will be a disappointment to their fathers if they don't buy them the best gadget or gizmo out there. A thought hit me while I was watching the bazillionth Fathers' Day commercial: aside from the techy stuff, every single one of these commercials is something that Dawn would love.

Barbeque stuff? Don't let me stand in the way of the professional. There's a reason why no one has EVER asked me to cater anything. The kitchen is my kryptonite. If the ingredients aren't already assembled, I will starve to death in a fully-stocked pantry because I can't find anything to eat. I don't see ingredients as means to an end. I look at a bag of flour and think, "I can't eat that." Dawn can take a cup of flour and an egg and make a three-course meal somehow.

Tools? I'm not as completely useless here as I am in the kitchen, and I even picked up a few skills as we finished off the basement last year. I did all the electrical wiring (once Jesse showed me how) and everything worked. Believe me, I tried very hard to hide my surprise when all the outlets and lights worked on the first try. Dawn's resume is much more impressive. She has replaced toilets and fixed various plumbing problems, she bull-floats concrete, she replaced the chadelier in the dining room, installed the garbage disposal in the sink... and the list goes on. The morning coffee crowd at Subway ask me how I keep up with her.

It doesn't bother me at all that a Fathers' Day flier appeals more to Dawn than it does to me, and I don't hear anyone else complaining either. Ever had her BBQ pork ribs or steak? Have you seen what she can do with a cake? There's no loss in having me step aside here...

I Take it All Back

I've never really been a fan of the elliptical machines in the past, and I'm not even sure why. I can assure you my opinion wasn't formed from my exhaustive study into consumer research or the recommendations from trained fitness professionals. I'm pretty sure it came from my observation and misguided assumptions. It looks so easy, how could it give any sort of workout? So when we had the opportunity to "store" one at our house, I was thinking the padded handle bars would make great coat holders.

Last night I put all my exercise gear together and told myself I'd give it a shot first thing in the morning, which apparently is around 9:30. I was up at 6:30, but it took me a while to really get myself into "the zone". Then all the kids decided to gather and make fun of Dad's shorts, or the bright white legs, not really sure which.

The first three minutes were a breeze. At this rate, it's going to take me an hour on this thing to feel like I've done anything.

Then I started to feel my legs... calves complaining a bit, quads grumbling about being tired. By minute 6 (had to check my watch to make sure), I was sure the kids had been playing with the resistance dial and had it cranked up. Nope, still set to 4 (1 being the lowest). Six minutes of cardio, that should be good for the day, right? Five minutes a day on the Ab Rocker is supposed to magically give you chiseled abs (and huge arms too somehow, judging by the commercials).

I can make it to half an hour.

Ten minute mark... fifteen more should be fine. I'm sweating so much, my vision is getting blurry. Memo to me, make sure I have a small towel handy for tomorrow. At this point, I can actually hear the siren call of Heavenly Hash ice cream in the basement.

Fifteen minutes... five more, and I'm good. There's a strange anorexic man wearing a black robe and holding a scythe waiting patiently in the corner. He keeps checking his watch periodically, then looking up at me as if he's late for an appointment...

Sixteen minutes... gah! I'm never going to make it to twenty. Now the guy in the robe is showing a movie... Ahh, there's me as a baby. I was cute back then. There's me in kindergarten... kind of a boring flashback really. Oh, you had to include the peanut butter incident. Was that really necessary?!

Seventeen minutes... Do I call you Mr. Reaper? Grim? Is that even your first name, or is it more of a title? Probably just hoping the scary outfit and outdated farm implement will distract everyone from the fact his name is Eugene or something. He probably became the angel of death to get back at everyone who made fun of him in elementary school.

Eighteen... I, Gary Hamon, being of reasonably sound mind do hereby bequeath my earthly possessions... Who's bright idea was this, anyway? The good news is that my calves aren't complaining anymore. No, they're talking with their union rep about going on strike.

Nineteen... go towards the light! Aunty Em, is that you?

Twenty... Done! I don't remember the floor being quite this wobbly before. We should really get someone in to make sure it's still level. I feel like Tim Conway in that classic dentist sketch where he accidentally jabs his leg with the freezing needle.

So, the elliptical totally kicked my butt. Maybe this is a sign I need to do more physical activity? I guess if you can look back fondly to a day when going up the stairs didn't involve two rest stops on the way, that could be a sign it's time to be more active...

Here's your sign...

I was in Whitecourt, AB today on a work trip. The "downtown" Subway had a problem with the women's restroom, and even had an "Out of Order" sign posted on the door. As I sat at a near-by table writing out the evaluation report, I amused myself listening to the customers repeatedly ask the staff if the restroom was working. The "out of order" sign wasn't small or hard to see by any means. It was written in English, so there was no language barrier to deal with. Hats off to the staff, they politely told the customers they could use the men's room until the women's was functional again, as opposed to several of the snappy responses they could’ve used.

Those of us who work in the customer service industry know that people, in general, do not read posted signs. You can put signs on the front door, the point of order, and in front of the till indicating the debit/credit machine is down so we can only accept cash and you will still get people who hand you their card. Not just one or two people. No, 60%-70% of them will try to pay with plastic. Then they get mad because "you should've put up a sign or something", at which point I will call their attention to the all posted signs they had to walk past, and I'll do it with a smile. Then the guy behind him will usually try to casually put his card back in his wallet without looking like an idiot.

There’s something about an “out of order” sign that makes people want to test it for themselves to see if the condition has somehow resolved itself since the sign was put up. Put the sign on a fountain pop machine, and sure enough someone will walk away with pop on their hands because they just had to try it. It's a fun game really...

Oh, I forgot to mention a few minor details about this afternoon's experience. The whole time these customers couldn't figure out the operational state of the restroom, the plumber was walking in and out while carrying various tools. When he wasn't going to and from his truck, he was in the restroom using a power snake (sounded like he was drilling through the tiles). The floor in the hallway was covered in water, which was coming from the restroom and there was a nice yellow wet floor stand near the hallway entrance. All that, and people still were asking if the restroom was working. What does it take for people to clue in?

Only in an industrialized society can people get away with this level of inattention. Think about it, if our agrarian ancestors had missed the blatantly obvious clues that the bridge was damaged or there was a predator in the area, natural selection would've quickly taken its course and the stupidity gene would be gradually worked out of the pool. Instead, our society thinks it's somehow rude to tell people they don't have the intelligence of a twenty pound sack of potatoes.