Grandpa's Funeral

June 13th was a difficult day for me. I was in Edmonton for the week on business and I found out in the morning that my Grandpa Wynder wasn't doing well and then just after 1:00pm he passed away. Somehow I held it together long enough to get all my work done on Wednesday before I had my break-down on Thursday morning. 

Some of my best memories growing up were of spending time on the farm with Grandpa and Grandma. Who doesn't love getting up at 5:00am to milk cows? I used to think rocks grew on farms, because we kept having to pick them out of the same fields over and over again. Moving the irrigation lines, cleaning out the milk barn... Unlike my cousins who learned how to drive a tractor at 5yrs old, I didn't learn until I was about 15, which spared me from a lot of early morning harvests. My fixation on Chevy "farm trucks" (preferrably blue) can be traced back to time spent with Grandpa. I remember going to see Empire Strikes Back in the theater with Grandpa and Grandma (I don't think they liked it as much as I did), but we did enjoy watching Disney's Robin Hood together.

So, when I was informed I would be doing the Plan of Salvation talk for the funeral, I had mixed emotions. I enjoy public speaking with the right topic, but to have to speak at Grandpa's funeral was a bit nerve-racking. As I prepared, there were a few parts which didn't really click for me, no matter how hard I tried and on Monday morning, I was still wondering how I'd make it work.

Grandpa's brother Curtis was asked to talk about Grandpa's childhood and early years (for 2 minutes). Instead, he spent 17 minutes talking about the plan of salvation. I was crossing whole paragraphs out of my talk as he was giving his and suddenly it made sense why it wasn't coming together for me.

Anyhow, here's the talk as I had prepared it. The parts in red were the parts I had to cross out to avoid being repetitive. 

Let me start out with a disclaimer and some background: I remember when Mike got home from his mission and there was time leftover after he reported in sacrament meeting. The bishop thought it would be a good idea to ask Grandpa to come up and bear his testimony to fill up some of the extra time. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard a shorter testimony. It took longer for him to walk up to the pulpit than it did for him to speak while he was up there. Growing up, I learned that if there was a chance something was going to get emotional, Grandpa kept it short & sweet. I inherited his tendency to get emotional when speaking, so you may have to use your imagination to fill in the gaps if I have to wrap this up abruptly.

I imagine if Grandpa had to give this talk, he’d stand up here and say, “There’s a plan of salvation, and we’ll all be resurrected after we die.” And then he’d sit down again and that would be the end of it. Right now, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea.

Why do we get talks about the plan of salvation at funerals? I don’t think this is intended to be a time for teaching as much as it is a time for comfort. I don’t expect to say anything new that you haven’t heard before, and hopefully you don’t expect that from me, but I hope we can feel the peace and reassurance which comes from the Spirit.

I tried to think about what were the most comforting aspects to me of the atonement and plan of salvation.

Jesus and Lazarus

The story of Lazarus has been comforting to me, not because Christ demonstrated his power over death but because of the two words found in John 11:35, “Jesus wept.” I can tell you, if in this aspect only, I have been very Christ-like over the last few days. Jesus knew he would raise Lazarus from the dead, but still wept. I don’t know why he did, but it has been in those moments when I have felt the strongest comfort and peace from the Spirit. Maybe he wept as part of the baptismal covenant spoken of by Alma to “mourn with those who mourn.”

Why is the atonement so comforting to us? One of the biggest comforts to me is the knowledge that there is nothing we can experience in this life which Christ hasn't already experienced on our behalf. We may think sometimes that we are alone. President Henry B. Eyring taugh, "It will comfort us when we wait in distress for the Savior's promised relief that He knows, from experience, how to heal and help us... He could have known how to succor us by revelation, but He chose to learn by His own personal experience." ("Adversity", April 2009 General Conference)

When you go home, I want you to try an experiment to help understand what Christ voluntarily went through for us. Take a hammer, then use it to hit your thumb as hard as you can. This way, you'll have more sympathy the next time you run into someone who went through the same thing. Then take something heavy and drop it on your foot, you never know when a friend or family member will do that and you want to help them in ways you couldn't without having already experienced it for yourself.

Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught, “We can confidently cast our cares upon the Lord because, through the agonizing events of Gethsemane and Calvary, atoning Jesus is already familiar with our sins, sicknesses, and sorrows. He can carry them now because He has successfully carried them before!” (“Yet Thou Art There”, October 1987 General Conference)

Part of the atonement which we seem to overlook at times is how Christ "has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows..." (Mosiah 14:4)

Alma taught that Christ "...shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions ... of every kind;...

"... and he will take upon him [our] infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy,... that he may know how to succor his people according to their infirmities." (Alma 7:11-12)

This scripture became more powerful when I learned what the word 'succor' means. It comes from two Latin words: "sub", meaning under, and "courier" meaning a runner. The word succor literally means to come from below to run to someone's aid.

I have a friend who lost her mother and father within a few years of each other. People would come up to her at church and say how they knew what she was going through because they had also lost a parent. While they may have known what it was like for them to lose their mother, they couldn’t know what it was like for her to lose her mother. But Christ knows. It is comforting to know there are no depths I can reach that Christ hasn't already conquered, and he knows perfectly how to comfort me in my trials. He knows what it feels like when I lose a grandfather, not because he lost a grandpa, or knows someone who lost a grandpa, but because he already experienced my pains personally so he would lovingly know what I would need when the time came for me to go through it myself. That is comforting to me beyond my ability to express.

The Aramaic word for atonement also means "a close embrace". This brings to mind Lehi's statement of being "...encircled about ... in the arms of his love." (2 Nephi 1:15) and Mormon writing of being "clasped in the arms of Jesus" (Mormon 5:11).

The Resurrection

There's a scene in the Star Wars movies where young Anakin Skywalker has to say good-bye to his mother. "Will I ever see you again?" he asks. "What does your heart tell you?" she responded. When death separates us from those we love, we never have to ask, "Will we ever see you again?" The Spirit speaks to our hearts a resounding and comforting, "yes!"

Alma taught us, "[Christ] will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people..." (Alma 7:12)

"The soul shall be restored to the body, and the body to the soul;... all things shall be restored to their proper and perfect frame." (Alma 40:23)

I have never met anyone who has been resurrected. I don't even know anyone who has met a resurrected person, but I have had spiritual confirmations of the reality of Christ's resurrection. This is a tremendous comfort to me because it means I will be resurrected. It means my grandparents will be resurrected. It means there will be a day when we will again embrace all those we have lost to death.

The Gospel covenants are a comfort to me. The sealing power of the priesthood has been restored, which means even though death may separate us from our loved ones temporarily, the bonds of family cannot be broken. Grandpa and Grandma were sealed together in the temple and were faithful to their covenants, which means the sealing power binds them to each other and to their children.

Elder Russell M. Nelson taught, "Under God’s great plan of happiness, families can be sealed in temples and be prepared to return to dwell in His holy presence forever. That is eternal life! It fulfills the deepest longings of the human soul—the natural yearning for endless association with beloved members of one’s family. " (2012 April General Conference, Thanks Be to God, Sun. Morning Session -  Russell M. Nelson)

  

Going to Hell… to teach

I spend a lot of time in the car for work, so I often listen to conference talks, BYU devotionals, and other Church-related speakers. One speaker talked about how he was sure his father was in Hell. After a short pause, he added “…teaching those who haven’t heard the gospel yet.”

We read in Section 138 of the Doctrine and Covenants, “…from among the righteous, [the Lord] organized his forces and appointed messengers, clothed with power and authority, and commissioned them to go forth and carry the light of the gospel to them that were in darkness, even to all the spirits of men; and thus was the gospel preached to the dead.

“And the chosen messengers went forth to declare the acceptable day of the Lord and proclaim liberty to the captives who were bound…

“…the faithful elders of this dispensation, when they depart from mortal life, continue their labors in the preaching of the gospel… among those who are in darkness … in the great world of the spirits of the dead.” (D&C 138:30-31, 57)

So, when I say Grandpa is in Hell, I mean it in the best possible way. Brandon posted one of his memories of being Grandpa's home teaching companion and how they went each and every month and how Grandpa was very concerned about the families they visited. Now that he is freed from mortal pains and frailties, I can’t imagine him being any less diligent right now. I can see him and Grandma on another couples mission together, teaching others about the gospel which was so very dear to them. Just imagine getting that mission call, “You are hereby called to serve in the Hell, Spirit Prison mission…” Whew, at least it wasn't Saskatchewan, that was a close one!

So, yes, there is a plan of salvation and we will all be resurrected.

Aunt Vada told me on Sunday night that I wasn't allowed to make anyone cry. I'm happy to say I made it through my talk without tears (I didn't make it through DeVon's or Brandon's talks though), and I don't think I made anyone else cry either. I turned out that most of the talk I prepared was for my own benefit.