When I was on my mission, I got used to having people come up to me in stores and ask me questions, thinking I was one of the staff. It's one of the risks you take when you wear a white shirt, tie, and a black nametag. But now, it just drives me nuts. Just because I'm wearing a shirt and tie does not mean I work here. Don't get me wrong, if you are trying to get something off the top shelf and I happen to be near, I'm more than happy to help. As a side note, it's very tempting to stand and ask one of the Walmart staff for "help with items on the top shelf" just because the sign says so. I think it would be fun to watch them haul out the step ladder and climb up, then I would reach up and help them get it down, just to see the look on their face...
The last two times I've stopped in at the Sears near the office in Calgary, people just walk up and start asking me questions. Last time, I was crouched down while looking for something on a shelf and I kept hearing someone's voice. I didn't pay attention to it because they weren't talking to me. Then it started getting closer...
"Excuse me."
I looked up at a man standing in the aisle next to me. My mistake, I shouldn't have made eye contact.
"Can you tell me where [insert obscure item here] is?"
I just looked at him. I find it's better not to say anything than to come out with the first thing that comes to mind, which, for some strange reason, is usually dripping in sarcasm. I don't think he'd appreciate a detailed break-down of how to recognize Sears staff, with their distinctive blue vests and nametags worn prominently around their necks.
"Do you work here?" He's starting to pull a little attitude...
"No." If I say much more than that, I'm not sure I'll be able to reign it in later... I stood up, he looked a little sheepish and walked off.
Yesterday, I went in on my lunch break trying to find a button-down shirt. Apparently XL means huge waist and short T-Rex arms. Unless you're an over-weight Oompaloompa, Sears doesn't seem to carry shirts in your size. As I'm looking, some woman comes up and asks me if I work here. I said, "no" and expected she'd just wander off and look for someone who did. No such luck.
"Could you tell me how to get to the upstairs?"
First, when someone says they don't work here, why would you continue your line of questioning? Do you just assume the answer you seek is part of the collective knowledge every customer (aside from yourself) possesses? Do you figure somehow I may have stumbled upon this well-hidden secret? How about I ask you, "if a train leaves Boston traveling west at 80mph at the same time a bus leaves Seattle traveling east at 60mph, where will they cross and at what time?" Or better yet, "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?" That seems fair, doesn't it? I'll trade you one of your dumb questions for one of mine.
Second, I don't know how many of you are familiar with the Sears in the Marlborough Mall in Calgary. If you are, you'll know why I nearly lost the end of my tongue trying not to respond. If you aren't, the fact that there is no second level isn't immediately obvious to you. However, anyone who actually drives to the mall can clearly determine from the parking lot that the entire mall is one level. There is no upstairs, unless you're a maintenance worker and you have to service the heating/air conditioning units on the roof.
So from these and many other similar experiences at Walmart, Futureshop (funny story, I once sold a computer to someone at Futureshop before they realized I didn't actually work there), Best Buy, etc., I've come to the conclusion I need to either:
a) stop shopping while I'm dressed for work (I'm not allowed to go out in my pajamas, so that would really put a damper on my available shopping hours), or
b) carry a handy reference chart to show people how to recognize real staff at various stores. Kind of like those "spot the difference" books for kids, a photo of me next to a photo of the store staff...
"Hmmm, he is wearing a shirt and tie, but I don't see the bright blue vest or a nametag. He must be on a break, let's ask him anyway..."
The last two times I've stopped in at the Sears near the office in Calgary, people just walk up and start asking me questions. Last time, I was crouched down while looking for something on a shelf and I kept hearing someone's voice. I didn't pay attention to it because they weren't talking to me. Then it started getting closer...
"Excuse me."
I looked up at a man standing in the aisle next to me. My mistake, I shouldn't have made eye contact.
"Can you tell me where [insert obscure item here] is?"
I just looked at him. I find it's better not to say anything than to come out with the first thing that comes to mind, which, for some strange reason, is usually dripping in sarcasm. I don't think he'd appreciate a detailed break-down of how to recognize Sears staff, with their distinctive blue vests and nametags worn prominently around their necks.
"Do you work here?" He's starting to pull a little attitude...
"No." If I say much more than that, I'm not sure I'll be able to reign it in later... I stood up, he looked a little sheepish and walked off.
Yesterday, I went in on my lunch break trying to find a button-down shirt. Apparently XL means huge waist and short T-Rex arms. Unless you're an over-weight Oompaloompa, Sears doesn't seem to carry shirts in your size. As I'm looking, some woman comes up and asks me if I work here. I said, "no" and expected she'd just wander off and look for someone who did. No such luck.
"Could you tell me how to get to the upstairs?"
First, when someone says they don't work here, why would you continue your line of questioning? Do you just assume the answer you seek is part of the collective knowledge every customer (aside from yourself) possesses? Do you figure somehow I may have stumbled upon this well-hidden secret? How about I ask you, "if a train leaves Boston traveling west at 80mph at the same time a bus leaves Seattle traveling east at 60mph, where will they cross and at what time?" Or better yet, "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?" That seems fair, doesn't it? I'll trade you one of your dumb questions for one of mine.
Second, I don't know how many of you are familiar with the Sears in the Marlborough Mall in Calgary. If you are, you'll know why I nearly lost the end of my tongue trying not to respond. If you aren't, the fact that there is no second level isn't immediately obvious to you. However, anyone who actually drives to the mall can clearly determine from the parking lot that the entire mall is one level. There is no upstairs, unless you're a maintenance worker and you have to service the heating/air conditioning units on the roof.
So from these and many other similar experiences at Walmart, Futureshop (funny story, I once sold a computer to someone at Futureshop before they realized I didn't actually work there), Best Buy, etc., I've come to the conclusion I need to either:
a) stop shopping while I'm dressed for work (I'm not allowed to go out in my pajamas, so that would really put a damper on my available shopping hours), or
b) carry a handy reference chart to show people how to recognize real staff at various stores. Kind of like those "spot the difference" books for kids, a photo of me next to a photo of the store staff...
"Hmmm, he is wearing a shirt and tie, but I don't see the bright blue vest or a nametag. He must be on a break, let's ask him anyway..."
4 comments:
You made me laugh! I get the same thing often when I am shopping on my lunch hour dressed for work. I get that in JC Penney 99% of the time. People are seriously clueless!
I had that happen at a 7-11 in Lethbridge once. I was working at Perma-Green, a floral nursery and across my shoulder it said staff, but when have you ever seen someone at 7-11 wearing a green and maroon shirt? Hilarious!
LOL Gary - Love it. Used to get that all the time on my mission as well. We finally just started using a stock answer: "It's in the far left corner." Of course the "left" corner was always subject to which way the current idiot was facing so it was always fun if they did manage to find us again. We'd simply tell them the other left corner and then leave before said idiot could find us a third time. Love the rant!
Way too funny.
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