One of my resolutions...

I'm still not exactly sure I'm doing this under my own influence, I'm more inclined to believe Jedi mind control.

This year, I will complete the Raymond 10KM Road Race. There... I said it. Now I'm accountable for it. Anyone who reads this can now poke and prod as to how I'm progressing in my training (which I'm sure will commence sometime in the near future).

Let's check to see if this is an effective goal...

1. Recorded. Yep. And if I do enough posts fast enough, I can bury this post before anyone can see it :)

2. Specific. As specific as I can get it right now. The race is usually around the July 1st celebrations. When I find the specific date, then I'll post it here.

3. Measurable. Yes. The results can be independently verified... I either cross the finish line or I don't.

4. Positive. Yes. I will finish.

5. Stretching. I should probably do a lot of stretching, don't want to pull anything. Seriously, running 6 miles will be the longest I've ever done before. I'm not starting off with a marathon or anything, so I think this is the right balance between stretching and attainable for me.

I'd love to hear from any of the runners out there who have tips on staying motivated. Sometimes I have a tendency not even to make it out of the starting gates before I reach for the remote and a comfy chair. I'll be following Becka's Blog fairly closely, so hopefully that'll keep me fairly on track. I keep saying that I want to choose to be healthy before I'm compelled to be healthy, but then I never really change anything. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need more ice cream...

New Year's Resolutions

If you're like most of the population, you looked at your resolutions from last year and probably set them again for this year's resolutions because you forgot about them. If you had them written down, you're already in the minority. I'm willing to bet that for about 95% of you, your resolutions aren't really goals but more of a wish list.

I don't mean to be a downer, but for your resolutions/goals to be effective, they need to pass a few criteria. Effective goals must be:

1. Recorded.
If you don't write them down, your goals are just wishes. Writing them down is part of the process which makes you feel accountable. After they're written down, make sure you post them in a conspicuous place so you'll be constantly reminded.

2. Specific
Fuzzy goals yield fuzzy results. Make your goal specific to you. You're only competing with yourself, not with anyone else. Make it clear what you want. Don't use words like "if" or "try", they are counter-productive. Don't use percent goals (eg. 'I will earn 10% more this year'). Figure it out and use a real number ('I will earn at least $50,000 this year').

3. Measurable
Your goal must be measurable by you and at least one other person. This means "I will be nicer to the kids" isn't a goal. What you feel may be nicer isn't necessarily measurable by others. Instead, you could say, "I will give each child __# of positive comments each day." Have a specific date by which you will accomplish your goal. An example of a measurable goal would be, "I will weigh 200lbs by 1 Mar 2009." When I step on the scales on Mar 1, it'll be very easy to determine whether or not I have reached my goal and it can be measured by anyone.

A quick note on sharing goals with others. If you are setting a "Give up" goal (eg. no more chocolate, Diet Coke, etc.), then share your goals with everyone. The more people who will stop and ask how you're doing, the better. If you are setting a "Go up" goal (eg. to be #1 in your department), share it only with those who can actually help you. If you walk around the office telling everyone you're going to be #1 by the end of the year, you might find an increasing amount of resistance.

4. Positive.
Your goals must be written in the positive. Your subconscious doesn't know how to deal with a negative. Let me demonstrate... For the next 60 seconds, do NOT think about blue bunnies. Keep track on a piece of paper. How many times did you think about blue bunnies before I told you not to? After? If your goal is to stop eating chocolate, your subconscious acts like airport security with a photo of the most-wanted terrorist. Everything that comes in gets evaluated against your image of chocolate. "That's not chocolate, that's not chocolate, that's not chocolate... hey, that picture of chocolate looks pretty good." And soon, all you can think of is chocolate. Rephrase your goal in a positive direction, like "I will eat ___ # servings of fruits & vegetables each day".

Setting positive goals also means they are in-line with your values. If you value honesty, then robbing a bank is not an effective goal for you.

5. Stretching
Your goals must cause you to stretch and grow to some degree. If it was easy, you'd already be doing it. The trick is to set your goals so they are challenging enough to be motivating, but not so hard as to be depressing.

Defending Christmas

I posted this on facebook last year and felt it was worth revisiting...

It’s strangely interesting to watch Christmas evolve into something nearly unrecognizable. Each year, we as a society seem to take one more step away from the true meaning towards the politically correct atheistic/ agnostic “holiday season”. It has grown to the point where people feel self-conscious about saying “Merry Christmas” to others for fear of offending them. How long will it be until our calendars say “Festive Holiday” on December 25? Many people already refer to it as ‘Xmas’ (which drives me nuts).

Christmas is first and foremost the celebration and remembrance of the birth of Jesus Christ. That’s where it starts and ends.

Personally, I really don’t care that December 25th was once a Roman holiday celebrating the winter solstice and the Festival of Saturnalia. It could’ve been the Buldavian festival of the Holy Hippopotamus for all I care. What is important to me is what it is now, not what it was nearly 1700 years ago (it became Christmas sometime before 336 AD). We get to take one day to stop and think about Christ and what He did for us.

Whether or not you believe in Christ as the Son of God, a prophet, or just a wise teacher is up to you. I don’t believe that celebrating Christmas, or even calling it Christmas, detracts from anyone else’s experience or imposes a set of beliefs on anyone. I don’t feel threatened or that that I am being pressured into changing my beliefs when someone celebrates Hanukka. I’m secure enough in my own faith that I can respect and admire the beliefs and traditions of others.

In remembering the birth of Christ, we also remember His life, teachings, and example. But most of all we remember the sacrifice He made on our behalf in Gethsemane and on the cross. We remember how death is no longer the end, the resurrection of Christ means that we too will live again.

"Wherefore, how great the importance to make these things known unto the inhabitants of the earth, that they may know that there is no flesh that can dwell in the presence of God, save it be through the merits, and mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah, who layeth down his life according to the flesh, and taketh it again by the power of the Spirit, that he may bring to pass the resurrection of the dead, being the first that should rise." (2 Nephi 2:8)

Do you remember when Christmas used to bring a feeling of goodwill to others? When people would give service to others just because it was Christmas? People wonder why “goodwill to men” is on the decline as the focus of the season moves further away from Christ. . .

I Hate Flying...

That’s not really true. I actually enjoy flying. I love the window seats, watching the take-off and landing (which is saying something for someone who really doesn’t like amusement park rides). One of the most spectacular experiences I’ve ever seen was on the flight from Denver, CO to Calgary when I got to watch a lightning storm from above the clouds. How cool was that… about five to ten minutes of flight-time, watching as the clouds lit up as the lightning flashed in and between the clouds. I wish I could’ve caught it on film. But I digress…

What I really hate is the whole airport experience. Pulling into the long-term parking, getting the ticket, checking the display which claims to list the empty parking spots on each level. I have yet to figure out how they determine the number of available spaces when the whole process is automated. Here's how my morning went...

P2: 31. I don’t know what they were actually counting, but it sure wasn’t available parking spaces. 31 out-of-province plates, maybe. Oh well, it’s only 7:05 AM, boarding doesn’t start until 7:30, which still leaves me time to get through security and find the gate. I’ve already checked in on-line and claimed my seat. The flight doesn’t even leave until 8:00…

P3 is for short-term parking, can't stop there.

P4: 42. Again, I’d like to find out one day just what exactly those numbers really represent. I’m pretty sure there wasn’t room for 42 pair of roller skates anywhere on that level. 7:10 AM, getting a little tight on time, but still have room.

P5: 38. “Wo unto the liar, for he shall be thrust down to hell!” (2 Nephi 9:34). I could’ve found 38 frolicking unicorns on that level before finding even 1 parking spot. 7:15 AM, mild panic is starting to creep in slowly. I get my hopes up when I see what looks like a few parking spaces down at the end of the row. As I’m almost ready to turn in and park, I see the “Reserved” signs. “Memo to me: maim you after my meeting…”

P6: 88. I drove around for about three minutes wondering if Indiana Jones himself could find parking in this airport before finally finding a spot (I only had to drive against two directional arrows to get it). 7:20, I really need to move to get to security, never mind through it…

7:25, waiting in line at the security entrance as some woman in front of me is extolling the virtues of her little shih-tzu (who will be travelling with her, on her lap) and how adorable it is. Two thoughts are screaming through my mind, trying desperately to be set free:

1. There’s no such thing as an “adorable” shih-tzu, and

2. You’d better pray you’re not on my flight, or I’ll do everyone a favor and strangle that thing right now. Sure, they might frown on it on the outside, but inside they’d be giving me high-fives and putting me on their Christmas card list.

7:30, I’m now in the actual security line. For once in my life, I actually pick the faster of the two lines. Every once in a while, karma throws me a bone before hitting me with it. The woman in front of me this time felt compelled to wait until she got to the conveyor belt before starting to unlace her knee-high boots. On the plus side, she was short and her knees were fairly low to the ground to start with, meaning fewer laces to untie. On the down-side, she was wearing a shirt that didn’t fit when she was standing up. Let’s just say everyone behind her got a good look at the “tramp stamp” (I think that’s a more politically correct term than “porn star birthmark”) on her lower back. I hope she had a trust-worthy tattoo artist, or those were probably Japanese symbols meaning “advertise here”.

7:45, final boarding call for WestJet flight 150. Yup, that’s me… frantically trying to stuff my laptop back in the bag as soon as I can grab it off the belt without getting in trouble from the friendly security agents (they were even less inclined to humor this morning than normal). Karma must’ve figured I’d suffered enough already because my gate was the closest to security, or she was just toying with me. If I was flying AirCanada, I wouldn’t have been worried at all. In fact, I would’ve stopped for breakfast and still have been early. That’s why I prefer not to fly on airlines run by the devil himself. But I’m flying WestJet and can already picture the gate attendant running down the loading ramp, pounding on the locked door on my behalf, begging them to let me on.

I came around the corner to the departure gate and there are still four people in line ahead of me, so karma was lulling me into a sense of false security. The guy ahead of me decides to wait until the gets to the gate attendant to realize he doesn’t have his boarding pass out and ready. Just when did you think you were going to need it, Sparky?? I wanted to ask him if that was his unattended baggage over by the washrooms, but again my sense of social conformity won out. I have GOT to get that fixed one of these days...

If this were a flight heading South instead of North, I would gladly go through all this and more. I would expect it as some sort of rite of passage initiation to a warmer climate. It would be as though karma was exacting a toll for leaving the cold and snow behind and trading it for sunshine and warmth, and it would still be a bargain. But flying to Grande Prairie?? It’s only -6C in Calgary and expected to go back into the double-digit plus side while I’m gone. After all, the Grande Prairie airport isn’t exactly O’Hare. You have to walk from the plane to the terminal. Outside. In the cold, and snow, and wind. I mentioned cold, right? At least someone had been out earlier to shovel a path from the portable stairs all the way to the terminal entrance. The problem being that it had been long enough for the wind to drift snow over much of the path. Not to beat a dead horse (and then poke it repeatedly with a stick), but this would not be a problem in Ari-freakin-zona.

And then, to top it all off, somewhere between security and the Grande Prairie airport I managed to lose my watch. I know I had it in the Calgary airport because I was frantically checking the time every 30 seconds. I’m pretty sure karma stole it just to prove a point. Well played karma, well played…

A Couple of Chuckles...

We had a planned power outage on Sunday, which meant going to church at 8AM instead of 9. If it weren't for the fact we had kids in the primary presentation, I'm pretty sure the power would've mysteriously gone off at our house some time during the night, rendering all the alarm clocks useless. The one redeeming feature was that we were back home by 9:30.

I decided to curl back up in my bed, covered in four blankets (equivalent to 6 because two of them are folded in half... Dawn doesn't appreciate lots of blankets like I do). Dawn was in her recliner in the "sitting room" watching Animal Planet while I was sleeping. Never go to sleep while someone is watching Animal Planet.

I drifted off to slumber during a captivating documentary on Buddhist monks trying to protect their Asian honeybees from giant hornets. Quite interesting. Thirty of these hornets were able to kill a hive of 30,000 European bees in just under 3 hours. The Asian bees have a higher heat tolerance than the hornet, so when the scout invaded the hive, the Asian bees simply smothered it, raising the hornet's body temperature until it cooked. I drifted off to sleep somewhere after that, and for the life of me can't figure out why I still retain that trivial tidbit.

As I was somewhere between dead-to-the-world and dreaming, I could hear the narrator talking about sedating three of them for study. He described how the researchers were loading their tranquilizer guns and were waiting in position. I don't know why my brain decided that was the moment to receive audio input from the outside world, because it was very vexing trying to figure out how these researchers were going to use dart guns on the hornets. Granted, they were bigger than normal, but still... you have to be a really good shot to hit one with a dart gun. The narrator went on for what seemed like minutes before he said anything about these three specimens being elephants. Apparently I was asleep longer than I thought.

In other humorous news, about a week ago (roughly), Rhys (5yrs) was doing something he knew he wasn't supposed to be doing. Dawn told him if he kept doing it, he'd get a spanking.

Rhys thought for a second and replied, "That seems fair."

Why We Don't Set Goals

The results of my recent poll were unanimous in favor of goal setting. It didn't take very long to count the votes either, because there was only one. Anyhow, this is something that has always been an interest of mine so I hope someone else out there can gain something from this

Before I jump into the fun of setting goals, I want to start out with reasons why the majority of us don't set goals. I dare say that the vast majority of us know that we should set goals, but studies have shown that less than 3% of us actually have goals which we are working towards achieving. That's a pretty dismal number. As near as I can tell from my own study and observation, all our excuses fall into four categories:

1. Fear
2. Doubt
3. Lack of Ownership
4. Lack of Knowledge

1. Fear
The most obvious fear I think would be the fear of failure. No one wants to fail, so we often retreat from experiences that would stretch us and force us to grow. Somehow, I think if we're honest with ourselves, it's not really failure that we fear. Sure, public speaking may terrify some of you, but in the context of the really important goals, I don't think failure is our biggest worry. Let me explain with a quote:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone, and as we let our own light shine, we consciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." (Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles)

Jack Canfield once told a story of a lady in her 50's who was able to lift a car off her grandson who had become trapped underneath. In an interview with him, she said she didn't like talking about the experience because if she was capable of doing that, it would mean she was capable of doing so many other things she "knew" she couldn't do. She later faced her fear, went to college and got her teaching degree to follow a dream she had always felt was beyond her ability.

I truly and firmly believe that on some level this is the fear that holds us back from achieving our growth goals. It's not so much, "What if I fail?" as it is "What do I do if I succeed?" It's illogical at best, but I've seen it often enough to be convinced. Somehow, many of us are more comfortable accepting criticism than success.

2. Doubt
Whether you doubt the goal can be achieved at all, or you doubt your own ability, this is a big stumbling block to many people. We get all excited about setting goals from a book or a lecture, but when reality sets in, we find ourselves wondering if we can ever achieve the goals we've set. Low self-esteem, feedback from others, and social conditioning all tend to impede our progress.

Maxwell Maltz once said, "The most realistic self-image of all is to conceive of yourself as made in the image of God. You cannot sincerely hold this conviction without experiencing a profound new sense of strength and power."

We need to firmly believe that we are worth success, we deserve happiness, and that we have an immeasurable intrinsic value.

3. Lack of Ownership
This is why many corporate goals fail. People at the top get together and decide what the company is going to do, and then they tell the lower ranks what the goals are. But this can also flop on a personal level as well. If you don't seem to be motivated towards a goal, stop to see if it is even your goal. Are you caught in someone else's definition of success? There is a thriving industry built around appearance because society as a whole has bought into the idea of the perfect body or perfect skin.

There is no sense of accomplishment in achieving a goal that belongs to someone else. This is what Stephen Covey refers to as climbing the ladder of success only to find it leaning against the wrong wall.

4. Lack of Knowledge
I'm willing to bet that 95% of the New Year's Resolutions out there would not meet the criteria of being a real goal. Sorry if I burst any bubbles there, but it had to be said. Wishes aren't goals. To-do lists aren't goals. Wants aren't goals. But we treat them as if they were goals and then get discouraged when we don't achieve them. If not done properly, goal setting can be a demotivating process that can almost guarantee not reaching your target.

I want to walk through the process of setting goals. It has been said that the best way to really learn something is to teach someone else. Bear in mind that I'm not doing this because I have perfected goal setting in my own life, but because I need to reinforce what I already know and may not necessarily be doing.

Goal setting?

I was looking through some of my old files on the computer and came across a goal setting presentation I've done a couple of times at work. I thought this might be some good content to post here if anyone was interested (take a second to vote on the poll --> ).

The new Star Wars Lego Death Star has just been released, so that would make a good alternative if no one is interested in goals...